First Message Strategy #1: Go For Laughs
Do you have any favorite spots? The eagle-eyed among you will have noticed a common thread in these messages — they ask questions. Yes, your first online message is a chance to show your best side, but the way to do that is to flatter the recipient by asking them about their opinions and take on the world. After all, most people secretly love talking about themselves!
For the best results, you can even combine all three tips — find common ground, personalize it, and make it a question.
First Message Strategy #2: Connect On Common Ground
Have you got any recommendations? The conversation ball is now in their court, and you want to wait for them to hit it back before you try and send another message. Once they do of course, game on!
Try these tips to keep the online dating conversation going. So, they loved your opening line, and you two really do have a common interest.
Dive a little deeper and start building a bond based on that shared enthusiasm. I do love Netflix documentaries! My favorites are always the ones where they try and solve some sort of crime or mystery. Have you seen it?
My sister will be pleased someone has succeeded; she actually has a place up near Napa, so lives for stories about wine and keeps telling me to watch. But enough about my family. Or have you always been based in this part of California? Stunning part of the state, you must tell me more about it. Tailor it to their interests or their work, or even one of their photos.
14 Funny Online Dating Messages (First, Second, Third & Beyond)
A good first message is sweet, and short. One hundred words is about right: Just aim to get a conversation going. As they say in showbiz, leave them wanting more. Similarly, if you claim to love your job but the time stamp on your message says you sent it at 9. Stick to neutral hours, like lunchtimes and early evening. Ideally, write it before you leave the house to do something interesting.
Have fun writing your messages, and enjoy the process of meeting someone new. You can get as imaginative as you want with it. Your first message should be indicative of your personality. Oliver loves putting pineapple on his pizza and joking around. His approach to online dating is playful and helps him quickly find someone who gets him. Such stereotypes can stop someone from getting to know you on a dating site where superficial judgments are common — but you can also use them to your advantage.
He also makes his intentions known, appealing to online daters with a rebellious side and a raunchy sense of humor. The whole message gets more and more ridiculous as it goes on, but the awkwardness seems intentional. What I also love about this message is he keeps it clean. Last of all, we have I Hedonist making a self-deprecating joke on OkCupid. Oftentimes you can melt the hearts of jaded online daters with a clever quip or a quirky compliment. When she was growing up, her family teased her for being "boy crazy," but she preferred to think of herself as a budding dating expert.
As an English major in college, Amber honed her communication skills to write clearly, knowledgeably, and passionately about topics that interest her. Now with a background in writing, Amber brings her tireless wit and relatable experiences to DatingAdvice.
11 Online Dating First Message Examples That Get Responses
Bait a Date With a Good Pun. A clever quip can win someone over online.
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